Category Archives: Humour
I was reminded this morning of how I used to be, people who know you “from before” a brain blip tend to send your mind right back, to “another” you.
I recalled how reluctant I was to say that I was ill, how I backpeddled from treatment, how I refused medication for my OCD/PTSD for around six months and how when it all looks gloomy the thought of defining the sadness with big medical terms is enough to depress you – when you’re already depressed!
Here’s a news flash for anyone who feels like this at the moment:
I only started to heal when I got treatment, accepted the diagnosis, cried my eyes out (I put them back in) and then took meds – only 60mg in my case – but my long suffering therapist thought she’d have trouble even getting me to take 5mg of anything!
Therapy does make you better, I know it’s a long road and sometimes it seems neverending, but enjoy the moments in which you claim YOU back and can review the past with a knowledgable smile and gratitude that thanks to experts and rebalancing a chemical imbalance your life is yours.
Sure, it will be different, you will be stronger – no one goes through a mental health crisis without learning who they truly are – but that, in its own way is empowering. Cool, huh?!
Don’t let the bad guys steal your life, get help and the future opens up like a rose bud.
If anyone is down today I recommend this: Thanks Jo:-)
Let’s talk brain trickery…it is so easy when you have mental illness (or in a rut) to get stuck with stinking thinking. Thank God I suffer from it less than I used to…helped by a brilliant counsellor and CBT but I still fall prey to the occasional (read daily) thought error.
Like “I should have done this by now.”
“I’m taking too long loading the dishwasher, I have other stuff to do.”
“I must e-mail someone right now. They’ll be waiting.”
Really, the answer should be “why?” or “who said?” “what difference does it make?” “Is it a life of death importance?” BUT somehow the brain blip kicks in and two things happen in response to the stinking thinking:
You start to feel bad, like you’ve done something wrong and you tell yourself to do better, therefore demanding more of yourself which only adds pressure which exacerbates a stress related illness.
Anyone else seeing a vicious circle here?
Apparently it’s called the Demanding Thinking Error… It’s demanding and it’s a thought not a divine or true statement and it’s an error…so think of it as a number in place of a letter or a vegetable instead of a fruit. You don’t have to have it and use it just because it presents itself so if, like me, you have the demanding thinking error, don’t listen to that pesky inner voice, ignore it and remind yourself that life is to be enjoyed, it’s not a speed trial and you are a fabulous person doing just fine!
Happy rest of the day, smile, you’ve earned it. Have a slice of cream cake too, go on, you know you want to!
I wrote this poem – a tanka, hope you enjoy it:
Bedraggled, laughs, shakes
Showers humans, home and self
Mud,rain splattered flanks
Padding around in rude health
Dripping loving gleeful thanks.
It’s still raining but I’m a happy writing-editing-reading bod…YAY! Oh yeah and there’s a big sticky gooey and let’s not discuss calories chocolately creamy nutty dessert tonight, not that I’m looking forward to it, obviously!!LOL.